Almost every homeschool family has to deal with difficult questions and one of the hardest comes from your child. The question is: can I go to regular school?
If your homeschooled child is asking to go to school, you’re not alone. Children in homeschool settings will often ask to go to school, especially if they see school scenarios on TV and in the movies. Most parents fear this question, but given that we are guided by our children and what they want to do, we need to be prepared for questions like this.
You have some options, of course, as you are ultimately the person who decides whether your child homeschools or goes to a Christian college. You can choose to respond by saying that at this moment in time, you’ve chosen to homeschool. Or, you can ask them to think about it and decide in a year together. There’s no need to be saddened or offended by the question and it’s important to know that it’s not a reflection on your teaching if your child asks to go to school.
Your child deserves a say in their education, but this comes with limits. You won’t want your child to make the wrong choice and – as a parent – it’s why the decision ultimately lies with you. It’s a very fine balance to listen and respect their choices and have overall authority over their education choices. If you are homeschooling, there is clearly a reason behind it, and it’s important that your children understand these reasons in depth. It’s why a mutual, respectful conversation with your child is necessary if they have asked to attend school, especially if they are approaching their teenage years.
Children deserve to be heard, and if they continue to ask about attending school, it’s important that you understand where it’s coming from. Most of the time, it’s to be like other kids and experience a school environment outside the home. As a parent, you need to find a middle ground.
You may be staunchly against school in all forms, but your experiences of school won’t be the same as that of your child. If after an agreed length of time, your child still asks to attend school, it’s worth respecting their wishes and touring the local schools so they can dip a toe into the environment and decide for themselves if it’s for them. You can also agree on a deadline: so, if they want to continue in school but at any point wish to homeschool once more, they know you’re there for that, too.
The most important thing to realize is that if your child is requesting to go to school, you’re not a failure. You didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, you did something right. Parents have a job of encouraging independence, and you have managed to encourage your child to be independent and free in their thinking. You’ve raised a curious, intelligent child who naturally asks about the world outside the homeschool environment – well done, you!